At this point, you know the basics – i.e. BDSM is short for bondage, discipline, dominance and submission. As far as fetishes go, BDSM is having a moment with mainstream movie & TV success, constant pop culture references and even a rise in related porn searches. Whether you want to add some kink to your sex life, get turned on by power exchange or want to explore your submissive, dominant or switch side, the complex world of BDSM can be intimidating for beginners. We’ve put together 6 sexy and fun types of BDSM play that can help you figure out where to start and what excites you!
1. Lip Service
Consensual power exchange practices rely on communication. First and foremost, it is important to share what you like, your no-go zones and what you may be ok with. Is spanking in? Is blindfolding out? Even dirty talk expectations are smart to discuss. Not everyone may be up for hearing “daddy”, “mistress” or “my little cum slut” in the coital realm. Also, always establish a safe word. Whether you’re tired, hurt or simply must pee, using your safe word means, STOP. The safe word should stop all play instantly.
2. Roleplay
Roleplaying is an easy way for people who are interested in BDSM to explore what aspects of power play excites them. From sexy teacher/naughty student to roles like nurse, police officer or more long-term roles such as pet, ddlg or slave, roleplaying is an accessible and fun way to introduce BDSM into your sex life.
3. Light Spanking
A little taboo and a lot sensual, spanking is among the most popular types of BDSM impact play. It’s important to keep in mind that spanking can be painful and although there are people who enjoy pushing the boundaries of pain and pleasure, it’s vital to first discuss what you’re willing to try from hand spanking to paddles and floggers or more advanced tools like whips, canes and crops. Even if you fantasize about being strung up in rope and caned with a bamboo whip, we must crawl before we walk. Setting the mood and getting warmed up with gentle caresses and a few very gentle swats is a good way to determine where to start.
4. Breakaway Bondage
If you have interest in bondage of any type such as shibari or other rope bondage, handcuffs, chains, ankle spreader bars or any other type of restraint starting with more cost-effective breakaway bondage gear like Velcro handcuffs is an excellent place to start exploring. Besides a cheaper alternative to often pricy bondage gear, Velcro cuffs also provide beginners with the opportunity to explore this kink while maintaining enough control to un-cuff yourself at will.
5. Sensation Play
Sensation play and sensation depravation is a major turn on for a lot of people and a fantastic way to explore you and your partner’s body. From using a scarf as a blindfold to incorporating feathers, ice cubes or anything else you can imagine into your play session, sensation play is sexy at all levels of BDSM.
6. Look the Part
Do all things leather, latex or lace turn you on? Or maybe you’re interested in being on one or both ends of a collar and leash? From your local adult sex store to amazon, acquiring the right props and attire is relatively easy these days. Getting dressed up (or down) in a BDSM aesthetic is often the first time people realize they may have an interest in BDSM. So go ahead, look the part and get playing!